Where do you go when you Need to go?

Had "one of those days..." The kind where, whether you're intuitive or not, you can see that someone is just having a tough time. Even if you knew nothing about me, it was obvious that I was barely keeping it together.

Times like this are few, I am fortunate enough to say. But, when they occur, I need to get out of the house. There are just a few places that will do when I require a change of scenery to clear my head.

These are precious places. Places you share carefully. You don't need to have a bad time to taint the sacredness of this space. You need to be free to be yourself. Surround yourself with even false sympathy rather than feel you are boring someone with your need to vent.

I needed two of my safe places the other day. First, I went to the Art Café for a cup of coffee and my book. I probably shouldn't be reading it (since it often makes me cry), but it's reminding me so very much of myself, my current spiritual climate, that I am continuously drawn to it during whatever down-time I can capture. The kind owner offered me a hug and some sympathy... she could see I was struggling. That gesture is not necessary, but it's nice to not feel crazy, to feel safe enough to collapse for one day.

I can count on the coffee to be strong. There's soda water and my favorite breakfast plate (small salad, brie, eggs, and a croissant). The servers are attentive without hanging over your every bite. It's often quiet. Plenty of natural light. Here, I can turn inward and turn the volume down on whatever is bothering me.

Though, that wasn't enough the other day, so I went to Anya's. The coffee there is pretty good, too. But, better still, I am lucky to know someone who always makes an effort to understand how I'm feeling, to never judge me, to allow me to vent. Once I can get out my issues verbally in such a protective environment, it's easier to let them go and move on. To get back to feeling like myself again, balanced and content. A call to Tristan, a letter from my pen pal, a chat with Mom, and so on... these and few others calm the heart as well.

Where do you go when you need to go? I've heard of people who work out... I guess I do that, too. Some nights I know I need a yoga class to work through my emotions. However, I find I need a chance to talk things through at some point. I've heard of people who would rather distract themselves than deal with their problems. I suppose, given the right climate, I might feel overwhelmed enough to want to delay the process of talking through some troubles, but I would ultimately need to get back to the issue and break it down. I find it better to face things head-on before those things interfere with my work, relationships, and personal peace.

I've tried thinking about whether I can find a way to relate to others who prefer avoidance to confrontation. I suppose I avoid certain types of differences. For example, if I don't like "the way" in which someone is doing something, I will almost always avoid discussion. The issue in this case is based on my opinion, and just because someone is doing something differently from how I would do it, it doesn't make it "wrong" or worth the awkwardness of bringing it up. I won't bring up problems with someone who won't listen either. If I know my words and worries would be wasted, I'll keep my mouth shut.

That's all though. Even in those instances, I'll talk them through with someone I trust. I'll calm down in Art Café or class, but then I need to bounce my ideas off those who respect my process.

I hope to be a safe place for others to vent... to "have one of those days" as I pour a cup of tea. I have some strong opinions, it's true, but my goal is always to take care of my loved ones, to work towards what would give them peace. I am not prone to distraction, but I'll pull out a movie and popcorn if someone doesn't care to talk.

So, where do you go? What do you do? See a friend? Take a walk? Run to the gym? Open a bottle of wine at home and smoke on the porch? Call your sister?

I hope that, maybe just for today, that no one else is "having one of those days."