Saturday Speaks: My lucky stars

I am going to call it a three-way tie for highlights of the week. And the winners are...


Third Place goes to the image for Astronomy picture of the day:

What you see in this picture are "light echoes" 20,000 light years away. The light echo itself spans 6 light years in diameter. That's just neat.


Second Place goes to Astronomy news! Two of my favorite Leos sent me articles about the new Big Bang atom smasher machine (See articles: NYT and Yahoo). Also, my birthday subscription to Astronomy Magazine FINALLY came in today. I've got a handy calendar now of celestial events for the rest of 2010.

First Place goes to my postcard from Georgia in Cannes where she's working on her Masters Degree. It was unexpected and now a treasured reminder of friendship that I'll be leaving on my bed stand table for a while.

Friday Sabbath: Fear for Tomorrow

(from www.sfcollege.edu)

I find that the release of films like 2012 is arrogantly irresponsible. I'm not saying that we ought to expect but so much from the same director of Independence Day and The Day After Tomorrow (one reviewer said that if you just add 2012 to those last two films, you get this director's "I Hate Earth" Trilogy). Part of what concerns me is the use of the Mayan Calender to inspire fear among people whose first exposure to the Mayan concept of time may sadly be this movie. I have not seen the film, nor do I intend to (there are no facts, though historical theory is the film's launching pad... it's just extravagant, 250 million dollars worth of violence). But, judging from the trailer and the reviews, many people will see it. They will either laugh themselves out of the theater or they will have this pin-prick worry in the back of their minds as to whether or not they have three years left on planet Earth.

Say what you want about anyone who would believe this... I'm sure enough young and simply ignorant people will be disturbed by the implication... and Columbia Pictures is just yucking it up. If you go to the official website and look under the heading "The Experience," you find a clean, official-looking site called IHC (Institute for Human Continuity). The site information is completely fictitious, but they have designed it to look like an educational tool to help illuminate the secrets of the inevitable doomsday. They also kindly offer to put your name in a lottery of people that will be rescued from the calamity. While most of us know better than to believe a website labeled "part of the movie experience," I'm sure the site is decieving enough to worry some people. Plenty of movies are based on "real" material and not everyone is but so discerning.

And as for any giant planets running into us, as the movie and fake IHC website warn us about, go look at this article on www.astronomy.com (Nibiru Myth). If any planet were going to slip off its orbit and run into us, astronomers all around the world would be tracking it as you read this. But, since this is a topic not everyone is a total nerd about, few people are going to walk into a film with that knowledge. I'm willing to believe that most people are more willing to think that the government hides information about our demise than they are willing to do some astronomical research. So, even if they don't believe that 2012 will be their last year on the planet, might they worry about an eventual collision with a meteor or dead planet?

Most of the reviews are not favorable, so, hopefully most people won't take this fim seriously. It's not the first time we've "cried 'Wolf!'" Remember the year 2000? A lot of people, even people I knew, were freaked out about some major disaster occuring at midnight on the first day of 2000. At the very least, some idiots said all of our computers would stop working... but it's us who needed to get used to using a 20 instead of 19 at the beginning of the year date, not the computers. It's all numbers to the computers.

What is it with us and the end of the world? If you look at the Mayan calendar, they did record several fascinating celestial measurements. Something special is going to happen on December 21, 2012. The way I understand it, the bodies in our solar system will align together in a way they have not in some time. It will be interesting to watch... but the Mayans did not specifically predict a doomsday to accompany this event.

Unlike us, the Mayans did not view time linearly. That's all our doing with our Western thoughts of the apocalypse and a distinct beginning and end to time. The ancient Mayans saw time more cyclically. Some of their predictions extended beyond 2012, though 2012 is the end of the calendar that we know of. It is probable that 2012 merely marks the end of one cycle of time and the start of a new cycle.

I think most of us are a little nervous about the end of the world. It's not like we haven't heard numerous examples of how people believe it will happen. And, even if you don't go for the ideas of the major religions around the world, scientists have been warning us about our lifestyles and global warming and what have you for some time. The future is always dark and daunting... like the last ghost to visit Ebeneezer Scrooge. The Ghost of Chirstmas Yet to Come was depicted as a large, looming cloaked figure who never spoke and had no face that you could see.

This season's edition of Parabola discusses several concepts about the future from divination to the Mayan Calendar to the Taoist acceptance of the darkness of tomorrow. I have not finished it completely yet, but this is a very seductive issue. I am certainly one of those people who wishes she could know a little more about what will be. I know I'm not alone. There are probably plenty of people in our current economic climate who want to know when things are going to change, if they will change, and how they will change.

I have no crystal ball. I don't suppose I would want one. I would like to know some things about the future, but I certainly don't want a doomsday added to my already existing list of worries. Why live in dread? I wonder sometimes what good would come of knowing so much. I mean, sure, I would have liked to have known about bad traffic conditions before venturing out at a reasonable time to get somewhere 40 minutes away but not arriving for another two hours... the radio only helps so much depending on when you are where you are (Has anyone else who lives around here noticed that you can't get a report about 64 in the Williamsburg area to save your life?). But, knowing about the end of the world, or the death of loved ones... I think I'll pass. The worry would eat me alive and then I would be dead inside long before the cataclysmic event descends upon us.

So, movies like 2012, as the guy on www.astronomy.com says, "just scares children." It brings no information to the table. It's just two and a half hours of wide-eyed catastrophe and deafening noise. There's nothing in it that says we should just take care of the planet and each other before we cause our own doosmday that the universe had not scheduled. Spreading fear about an unlikely future is selfish sensationalism in the face of a society ignoring the work we need to do to stay here. The film capitolizes on the calendar of an ancient, mysterious society we can no longer interview for confirmation. How convenient.

And, if you get at all nervous about tomorrow, I end this entry with a Taoist parable I learned back in my VCU days in Asian Religion class:

...an old Chinese farmer lost his best stallion one day and his neighbor came around to express his regrets, but the farmer just said, "Who knows what is good and what is bad." The next day the stallion returned bringing with him 3 wild mares. The neighbor rushed back to celebrate with the farmer, but the old farmer simply said, "Who knows what is good and what is bad." The following day, the farmer's son fell from one of the wild mares while trying to break her in and broke his arm and injured his leg. The neighbor came by to check on the son and give his condolences, but the old farmer just said, "Who knows what is good and what is bad." The next day the army came to the farm to conscript the farmer's son for the war, but found him invalid and left him with his father. The neighbor thought to himself, "Who knows what is good and what is bad?"

(from http://vision-nary.com/weblogs/index.php/2005/07/20/taoist_parable)

And, one last thing to help you chuckle:

(from www.theness.com)

Thursday Kitchen: The endless run-around of winter holidays

The book club had a mini-Thanksgiving meeting this past weekend. We have a number of vegetarians in our group, so there was Tofurky.

Go ahead. Be afraid. We were afraid. Even the vegetarians were afraid... who had attempted to bake fake turkey in the past and... we'll say it was overcooked. It's memory frightened our non-meat eaters. We were all aghast at Johanna's bravery to go where no sensible vegetarian would ever go again.

And, it actually was not terrible. For her friends, she took on the challenge and made something slightly more than edible. I'll admit, I'm grateful for the wild rice center and the lovely gravy, but it was not horrible, it was not scary, and we all ate it with surprised delight along with green salad, bread rolls, cranberry sauce, potato salad, pumpkin pie, and oyster stuffing (It's a family tradition in Johanna's family).

My friends are good sports. We enjoy celebrating holidays together in the ways we can... which usually means before or after the actual day. We all have families to visit, obligations to fulfill, etc. So, since we can't do it all in one day, can't eat but so much in each home, we celebrate when we can.

I remember when I was in my first long term relationship and we did the holiday run-around. I actually enjoyed it. On one day, I was able to see so many people I cared about. Yeah, it's a lot of food, a lot of driving, and this old boyfriend really didn't care for the stress of it. But, making time for those people... I never found it stressful. Sure, I didn't want to leave my own family when it was time to see someone else, and the driving didn't always go in a convenient or efficient order, but on these days, I saw so many people, as many people as I reasonably could, that matter so very much to me.

But, then, families do this run-around, too. One of my friends' is having three separate Thanksgiving dinners to be with three different sides of family. Another friend is celebrating Christmas this Thursday, on top of Thanksgiving, so that they the whole family can be together (one member needs to go out of town for Christmas).

And then there's me. For the first Thanksgiving in my life, I will be in another state than my mother. So, since my mother knows how immature I am about not being able to fit all my families across the States in one day, she's also preparing a mini-Thanksgiving for me on Sunday after I teach... so I can have my favorite holiday dish.

This is the dish my grandmother made for me whenever I asked. If it was summer, if it was my birthday, it didn't matter. She knew it was my favorite. When I was a "bad vegetarian" from ages 10 to about 15, she would make it for me just because she knew I would eat an entire plate of it. We have never really gotten it right yet, it still doesn't taste exactly the same as hers, but we keep trying, and my year can't end and begin again without it.

So, Mom's making me Wagner stuffing. On Sunday. A nothing day that will become my own special Thanksgiving.

I had Thanksgiving with my friends, and I'll have a Thanksgiving with my family, and then I'll have Thanksgiving with the rest of my family. It's about the meals we have together... that a few times a year, as many of us that are able get together to share a meal of the foods we can depend on. Turkey, green beans, bread, sweet potatoes, cranberry sauce, stuffing, pecan pie, wine, apple cider... and the list goes on with special things many of us agree are our favorite dishes. And no one makes them like your aunt, his older brother, or my grandmother.

It's just a dinner, a dinner for which we all know the menu year after year... but it reminds us what time it is, what day it is, and for whom we must travel the distance either in the car or choosing our own special day so we can be together.

Wednesday: Taking time

I guess my body does not like antibiotics. Due to this perpetual fatigue, I will not be able to post today. I will do my best to write a double entry tomorrow.

Tuesday Favorites: Another cup of coffee

I have had a rotten week. I've been sick for most of it, and that means I've been a slug. I sit. I moan. I sleep. I watch reruns. I sleep more. I take my vitamins and drugs twice per day. I remind myself to eat since each hour looks like the hour before from here...

And this makes me feel like such a waste of space. Shouldn't I be doing something? Doesn't this mean I'm weak? Worthless? It's been a week of nothing. Of heating pads and hot liquids. I haven't even been able to do any decent writing thanks to the headaches. I'm making no contribution to the world. I just sit here. I sit here and wish I were doing something else...

...like drinking something with caffeine. Since I'm trying to boost my immune system, I've only been drinking non-caffeinated echinacea tea that reeks of licorice. Echinacea tea. For a week.

So, naturally, I've been thinking about one of my favorite things... coffee...

~~~

I remember mornings on the second floor porch. She would call and, whether or not I had made myself beautiful, I would drive over. We would sit in low beach chairs, behind the plants she used to cover the railing. She would smoke and we would drink Turkish coffee. The Illy juices tanned in the sun and we would talk... or not... she told me in the beginning of our friendship, "If you want to be a plant, be a plant. You don't have to say anything. Just be a beautiful, American flower. You can be that here."

~~~

There were two special coffees at B&N... the old one in Newport News. The first was a first, a very first, with a 17 year old boy who would only drink Earl Grey tea. I had a stupid mocha (this was before I was a barista... now I know better) and hardly said a word. Despite this high school timidity, I knew that night that this would be someone who would help to shape many of the parts of me I will always respect. Just by knowing each other and being together, we would cultivate some of the foundation of our selves. The second was sad, very sad. A dear friend, who might as well have been my brother held my hand, barely could lift his cup, and tearfully told me things he couldn't tell anyone else. I just sat there, lightly tapped the top of his hand with my thumb, and listened. This talk over mass produced white ceramic mugs made it clear to me that I was useful for something. Something pretty great.

~~~

Thursdays are sacred days. I have my time with my person. She makes amazing coffee. We sit on opposite sides of the couch, and we relax into ourselves. We keep each other's secrets. Her warm living room folds around us and, for a little while, the world is okay. It doesn't matter if we need to say a lot or very little. We get it. Just drink your coffee and stop worrying.

~~~

I don't usually like my mother's coffee... but on our fall trips to the mountains, it makes the sun come up. In the mountains, I'm someplace that gives me peace, that resonates with my spirit and quiets my mind. My whole immediate family is with me. Maybe my brothers are sleeping, maybe Daddy is reading something, and Wendy might be trying to dig a hole into the couch. Mom and I look out the window and count the colors. We lose track. We're just together.

~~~

After a somewhat stressful trip to New York City, I woke up. Unless I'm in the mountains surrounded by my family, mornings are not my time of day. When I sleep in a hotel room, however, it's harder for me to stay asleep. All those different sounds. Different smells. It was the last day of the trip. Time to go home. Before heading out, we decided to take a walk and we found an outdoor café. It was summer. The air was cool and warm at the same time. It was a disgustingly perfect sky that talented people have surely painted once or twice before. We were the dorky two people grinning and sipping cappuccinos in the cheesy black and white photograph of a greeting card in which only we were in color.

~~~

Coffee is the quick catch up that keeps some of my most prized friendships intact and up to date. In between the working, assignments, relationships, moving, what have you, we make a little time to order a real macchiato and chat. I do a lot of constructive nothing with my favorite people...

...people who have reminded me of the material that makes me who I am. I can imagine all of my perfect cups of coffee every time I smell the earthy caramel in my cup... and I don't need to be anywhere.

Though I have sat here for days feeling like a beetle on its back, I never stop. Nothing in my head, my heart, stops. I didn't do anything productive all those coffee breaks ago, not in the form of tangible paper evidence or tasks on a list being completed. I comforted my friends, bonded with loved ones, found solace in the effort of others to make time for me. And while I sit here, needing to consider something more pleasant, I can think of all those I love and those that have loved me. That feeling comforts me while I rest rather than rush. It feels like I am exactly where I need to be at this moment.

I am looking forward to soon having another cup of coffee...

Monday Review: Five Recent Amusements

1. The Paris Piano Trio
My aunt told me about a classical trio coming to the local library to perform. I had not been to our Regional Library's auditorium since the lecture on Darfur. It's a nice, intimate venue for talks, choirs, skits, and chamber music. The Paris Piano Trio includes Régis Pasquier (violin), Roland Pidoux (cello), and Jean-Claude Pennetier (piano). Considering they have been playing music together for half of their lives, they are still very lively, very connected to one another. In such a small performing hall, you can see more clearly the way they communicate with eye signals, elbow lifts, head nodding, etc. They all still feel the emotion of the music as well... they are the kinds of musicians that play songs with their entire bodies. They played Robert Schumann's Piano Trio in D minor, Op. 63 first. The violin was definitely showcased in this piece and the violinist was truly impressive. Second, they played Piano Trio No.2 in E minor, Op.67 by Dmitri Shostakovich. This musical offering was definitely my favorite. It had amazing character and a storyteller quality to it. The third piece was the most disappointing part of the evening (well, that and the badly written descriptions in the program); Piano Trio in B Major, Op.8 by Johannes Brahms. The musicians were playing their hearts out, but the music was repetitive and boring. All in all, I thought it was a great way to spend a random Wednesday night.

2. Lars and the Real Girl
You know, I can only say so much about this movie. If I say too much, you might get uncomfortable and not want to see it. But, you should. It's weird... I mean, it's Ryan Gosling and Emily Mortimer, the Prom King and Queen of performers in weird films. Still, I think it's provocative and surprising. You definitely walk away with an uplifted feeling. So, I won't say anything else. It would be too weird. Just watch it. Give it a chance. Anya had to put the movie in my purse and make sure I walked out with it to get me to see it... and I'm not entirely disappointed that she succeeded.

3. Yoga + Magazine
Any magazine, even the good ones you really like, can't be great all the time. The last Yoga + I received was uninspiring. The one that arrived in the mail today is, on the other hand, very interesting. There's a little more Indian philosophy and less physicality in this issue. There is the discussion, for instance, of actual Tantric yoga (it has nothing to do with bizarre sex rituals), of sacred activism (in the form of peaceably reaching out to those in need like Mother Teresa), natural tips for insomniacs, and meditations for emotional healing. I was most drawn to an article on touch. As a yoga teacher, I am very reserved about touching people. People have been known to walk up to the front desk and say, "I don't want anyone to touch me." While in most day to day circumstances I would feel the exact same way, the touch of a yoga teacher can be both helpful and healing. Aside from the fact that you learn about trust in a safe environment, a firm touch drawing you into the correct posture makes you feel protected. I appreciated the chance to explore this idea in this article.

4. Terry Jones' Medieval Lives
I was never a huge fan of The History Channel. If I wanted to watch a lecture, I could go to school. But Terry Jones, one of the Monty Python boys, hosts a fun special mini-series on iconic figures of the Middle Ages. He basically explores the reality behind the myth of The Knight (not as chivalrous as Chrétien de Troyes would have you believe), The Damsel (not the Victorian sissy that you might imagine), The Alchemist (he's not totally cracked---medieval scientists and doctors still made contributions to medicine), etc. You get to learn about something that busts up your movie illusions and feel fine with it because you have Python-esque delightfully irreverent drawings to tickle you on the way down that wake up call. I could probably quibble with a few points here and there on the research into the "historical truth," but there's nothing major worth mentioning. He talks to interesting specialists and uses plenty of manuscript writings to explain his findings. And it's fun... there's a castle in each episode and a mocking skit to illustrate the myths to frame the story (how very medieval...).

5. Barbara Gabowitz's Scrapbook, 1953-1958

My professor charged our Life Writing class to use autobiographical material to create fictional characters. I chose the scrapbook of a teenaged girl in which she documented her experiences over several summers at a Jewish summer camp. It was rather amusing. It's all about her various boyfriends. She dated three guys named Barry, two guys named Jerry, a Jackie, a Mark, a Jules, and so on. There are tons of love letters between these young people... and they're pathetic. It's pretty funny - saying such grand, large things and clearly not having a clue what they mean. The grammar and penmanship are atrocious. They only guy with a personality, based on the content of his letters, was the one poor schmuck in whom Babbi had no real interest (she said she "played him for a sucker"). What was peculiar and a little disturbing about my findings were the number of dance invitations and mock marriage licenses. Organized, encouraged dating seemed to be the way of this camp. According to David, it's still kind of like that now, but in the 50s, there were pre-made invitations in which a boy could fill in the names and send to the girl he wanted to take to yet another ridiculously themed dance. I haven't seen so much themed occasions since elementary school... barn dances, sweetheart dances, cabarets, etc. And this Babbi piled up more than one invite per dance. The mock marriage licenses were signed by rabbis! Everyone was encouraged to "play house" so to speak... which means Babbi has been divorced three times and married about four! It was... an educational experience.

(PS: Referring back to Sunday, 4 out of 20 tasks on my To-Do List this week have been completed.)


(Images borrowed from www.main.nc.us, http://blogs.multcolib.org, www.himalayaninstitute.org, http://divxplanet.com, and http://blingkits.com.)

Sunday Reflections: Will I ever learn?

I've spent yet another week feeling sick. That storm did not help things. I've been in and out of consciousness for days. My soggy brains are still thawing out, so, this is just my list of the things I meant to do this past week that I didn't due to my condition. The goal is to complete these things this week:

1. Reorganize my desk (It's driving me crazy!)
   
2. Finish a letter (I started it the first few days of October...)
   
3. Send Thank You notes I wrote last month
   
4. Write five journal entries for class
5. Draft a paper
6. Do something with those birthday cards on the table (It's been over a month... time to let go)
   
7. Continue research on women in Okinawa
8. Respond to some emails
9. Write more yoga blurbs for work
10. Consider composition on Thanksgiving letters (as this will be the first Thanksgiving I spend away from home)
11. Start reading the new Jonathan Safran Foer book (I've had it since Monday... it taunts me)
    
12. Bank (Blah)
13. Pick up package at the rental office (It's been there since Thursday, but the office shut down and I haven't made my way down there yet... we apparently have homemade blankets waiting for us...)
    
14. Take my vitamins (I've been saying this for years...)
    
15. Watch my current Netflix movie (Doubt)
16. Have my regular date with Anya
17. Make bread (Missed my toast this week)
    
18. Crack open the winter issue of Parabola
19. Take a hot yoga class for myself
20. Plan out my holiday messes (Trying to avoid missing the holidays due to gift production like last year)
    

How much you want to bet that barely five of these things actually happen this week? I don't know if I'll ever learn. I find so much confidence and hope in making my precious little lists... and watch the days go by as though Life is telling me where I can put that list...